I came really close to masturbating last night.. I didn't even notice myself doing it at first.. I'd had a drink went to bed started to toss and turn for a while and the next thing I know I'm fingering myself...
I have kind of negative views on masturbation.. I was always a big believer in a second class shag being better than a first class wank. Of course I have masturbated but it's always been very much a kind of frustrated pissed off wank rather than the whole bubble bath and alone time thing that a lot of my mates do.. I actually turned to sex with women (well it was basically just mutual masturbation) mainly because I couldn't stand the though of sexual activity by myself..
I kind of instilled my negative views on masturbation in my husband. When I went to Afghan I told him I was intending not to masturbate for the whole time because the sex would be better when we got back... It was hard at times especially when I got pissed off with it all and just wanted to relieve tension... But the sex was really good when I got back on R and R and when I finished the tour..
I think removing masturbation as an option is what makes our sex life so good... I mean at first the sex was pretty bad... but over the course of 6 months I went from having some of the worst to the best sex of my life.
Anywho hubby is away for a few days and last night I just felt really well... you know...
I like to seperate missing someone sexually from missing them as a person.. when I told him today I was missing having sex with him (as well as him) he offered to come home for a few hours...
He's done that in the past... I was on exercise once and he drove 5 hours each way just to have a 15 minute shag in a shed.. He hated it ... I loved it and really needed it at the time...
I'm not that bad this time I can wait another few days...
I know it makes me sound like some nympho but I have my self control..
Incidently I'm considering sacking this blog and maybe finding some other outlet... I know I've said in the past that readers aren't important to me and I just use it to orgainise my thoughts... but the thought that people could read this but somehow aren't... well it's not very satisfying and I don't think I'm getting as much as I hoped out of it..
Showing posts with label marraige. Show all posts
Showing posts with label marraige. Show all posts
Sunday, October 25, 2009
Tuesday, January 13, 2009
I'm going to try and free myself from the whole blog as a diary kind of thing and just talk about whatever I feel like. It annoys me that hubby won't let me tell the story about how we met in polite company. He'll just say yeah we met at a party then give me an intense look to remind me that there's no need to flesh out the details (it was actually a dinner party so imagine a party and then add pretentious food and coversation and remove anything remotely fun)
My sister had invited me with her then bf. She begged me to go to make up the number as her dickhead bf was making such a fuss out of it. Anywho I had just gotten back from Iraq (I was in the army, that's actually a key part of the story lol it's good to edit isn't it?) and was on post tour leave but I was staying in camp for the first few days before I went on holiday to cyprus with some mates.
Anywho it was just awful, there was one other single bloke there but neither of us was interested. Then there was this shrew who kept wanting to talk about the wars in Iraq and afghanistan (apparently they were both all my fault) and her mate and and my sisters bf who were apparently her little cohorts kept pushing her along.
So anywho I just started to get drunk on the wine (some more snide comments but it made the company bearable) and just nodded and smile. But this shrew's bf kept interrupting everybody and saying they should all listen to my opinion. I actually didn't have any opinion, but I was quite chuffed that he cared what I thought so I did my best to form one quick time. So I spouted some nonsense which he didn't actually agree with but managed to rephrase for me so it didn't sound quite so witless, and he managed all this without being condescending.
Anyway future hubbie is looking red hot right about now, and I'll be honest the fact that he's the shrew's gf only makes him more appetising. So i'll skip through dinner to when I managed to get him alone in the hall and put my knickers in his hand and whispered that it would be worth his while nipping upstairs with me for 10 mins.
Of course he didn't. I was v shocked and v upset,. So I went back to the table and just got more progressively drunk.
Anywho I'll skip ahead and make clear why the story of how I met hubby isn't really one I can't tell in polite company. I was very drunk struggling to walk drunk I was also getting a bit aggressive towards the shrew.
Anywho how to get me back to camp, my dimwit sister was going to call me a minicab, untill future hubbie pointed out that he wasn't going to put a woman that could barely walk into a cab alone. So he was going to drive me back to camp and shrew and her mates were taking a cab (he's actually teetotal)
Anywho Shrew wasn't happy, I was sensing that my oppurtunity was coming around again, it wasn't.
On the trip back he managed to fend off my several attempts to fellate him, he also ignored my suggestions of good places to pull over.
anywho back to camp, I'm still not sure how he managed to get onto camp, I think what happened was he asked for a female member of the guard which there wasn't. He wasn't prepared to leave me in an all male guardroom (which I don't blame him for) and wanted a female to take me back to the room.
The guard commander couldn't care less he wanted me to make my own way back to my bunk. But future hubby wasn't having it. So the guard commander sent us both on our way he shouldn't have he didn't know hubby from adam, but I think cause he was dressed smart and spoke confidantly he intimidated the guard commander a little.
Anyway back to my room, where I had one last try confidant this would be the one. No chance. So i chucked off my dress which must have caught him by surprise cause I wasn't wearing any undies now and got into bed and that was all I remember. He actually left the knickers I gave him in my laundry basket.
So yet another turn as a social hand grenade. Any who a few days later when I was about to leave on holiday I got a call from the guard room someone was at the gate for me and i didn't recognise the name. It was future hubby, asking if I wanted to do to dinner, anyway I was getting ready to leave so we just went to a cafe for a tea.
He'd chucked his missus, I was fucking astounded. I was embarressed and got angry about what he expected to happen. But he was perfectly calm and let me rant for a bit, and I left with his phone number. He actually woudn't take my mobile no cause he said he didn't intend annoying me.
Anyway I didn't play the usual game of making him wait, the flight to cyprus was long enough. I rang him in the airport got his email and spoke to him 2 or 3 times a day along with long sessions in the internet cafe.
So thats it I came close to having a shag a few times but I just didn't feel like it. The whole holiday was intended as a shagfest so my mates got a bit pissed with me and I got dumped. So I was reduced to sightseeing around one of the most staggaring beautiful islands in the world !! imagine
What would happen is future hubby would research where I should go, then off I'd go and see it. It was quite strange having all this interaction with a guy thousands of miles away waiting for me when I got back.
My sister had invited me with her then bf. She begged me to go to make up the number as her dickhead bf was making such a fuss out of it. Anywho I had just gotten back from Iraq (I was in the army, that's actually a key part of the story lol it's good to edit isn't it?) and was on post tour leave but I was staying in camp for the first few days before I went on holiday to cyprus with some mates.
Anywho it was just awful, there was one other single bloke there but neither of us was interested. Then there was this shrew who kept wanting to talk about the wars in Iraq and afghanistan (apparently they were both all my fault) and her mate and and my sisters bf who were apparently her little cohorts kept pushing her along.
So anywho I just started to get drunk on the wine (some more snide comments but it made the company bearable) and just nodded and smile. But this shrew's bf kept interrupting everybody and saying they should all listen to my opinion. I actually didn't have any opinion, but I was quite chuffed that he cared what I thought so I did my best to form one quick time. So I spouted some nonsense which he didn't actually agree with but managed to rephrase for me so it didn't sound quite so witless, and he managed all this without being condescending.
Anyway future hubbie is looking red hot right about now, and I'll be honest the fact that he's the shrew's gf only makes him more appetising. So i'll skip through dinner to when I managed to get him alone in the hall and put my knickers in his hand and whispered that it would be worth his while nipping upstairs with me for 10 mins.
Of course he didn't. I was v shocked and v upset,. So I went back to the table and just got more progressively drunk.
Anywho I'll skip ahead and make clear why the story of how I met hubby isn't really one I can't tell in polite company. I was very drunk struggling to walk drunk I was also getting a bit aggressive towards the shrew.
Anywho how to get me back to camp, my dimwit sister was going to call me a minicab, untill future hubbie pointed out that he wasn't going to put a woman that could barely walk into a cab alone. So he was going to drive me back to camp and shrew and her mates were taking a cab (he's actually teetotal)
Anywho Shrew wasn't happy, I was sensing that my oppurtunity was coming around again, it wasn't.
On the trip back he managed to fend off my several attempts to fellate him, he also ignored my suggestions of good places to pull over.
anywho back to camp, I'm still not sure how he managed to get onto camp, I think what happened was he asked for a female member of the guard which there wasn't. He wasn't prepared to leave me in an all male guardroom (which I don't blame him for) and wanted a female to take me back to the room.
The guard commander couldn't care less he wanted me to make my own way back to my bunk. But future hubby wasn't having it. So the guard commander sent us both on our way he shouldn't have he didn't know hubby from adam, but I think cause he was dressed smart and spoke confidantly he intimidated the guard commander a little.
Anyway back to my room, where I had one last try confidant this would be the one. No chance. So i chucked off my dress which must have caught him by surprise cause I wasn't wearing any undies now and got into bed and that was all I remember. He actually left the knickers I gave him in my laundry basket.
So yet another turn as a social hand grenade. Any who a few days later when I was about to leave on holiday I got a call from the guard room someone was at the gate for me and i didn't recognise the name. It was future hubby, asking if I wanted to do to dinner, anyway I was getting ready to leave so we just went to a cafe for a tea.
He'd chucked his missus, I was fucking astounded. I was embarressed and got angry about what he expected to happen. But he was perfectly calm and let me rant for a bit, and I left with his phone number. He actually woudn't take my mobile no cause he said he didn't intend annoying me.
Anyway I didn't play the usual game of making him wait, the flight to cyprus was long enough. I rang him in the airport got his email and spoke to him 2 or 3 times a day along with long sessions in the internet cafe.
So thats it I came close to having a shag a few times but I just didn't feel like it. The whole holiday was intended as a shagfest so my mates got a bit pissed with me and I got dumped. So I was reduced to sightseeing around one of the most staggaring beautiful islands in the world !! imagine
What would happen is future hubby would research where I should go, then off I'd go and see it. It was quite strange having all this interaction with a guy thousands of miles away waiting for me when I got back.
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